Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Money, home, and some other things

Y'all. I am sorry. Srsly. I remember back in the day when I used to update this blog like every two days or so. It's now been 10 days since my last update. Wtf! I have a couple good excuses, but for the most part I'm just lazy, LBO.

Excuse #1: I started another part-time unpaid internship, my second. I'm blogging in a semi-official capacity now, which is exciting. Please check it out and holla at me. My avatar is, as you may have guessed, Ms. Meg. I have lots of ideas for what I want to do for the site, but I'm not sure I will get to implement them because...

Excuse #2: As some of you saw on fb, I got offered a paying gig with a magazine company. It's still just an internship, and it's only hourly with no benefits BUT it's still money, and it's editorial work. I will be broke as a joke for a while, and my parents will probably still be helping me out a bit, but at least I'm not selling my soul. I will hopefully keep blogging for my second internship in the evenings and on the weekends, but we'll see how that works out.

Excuse #3: I had what can only be called a mini-breakdown this past Sunday night. A spent the weekend with me in NYC, and we had a good time for the most part, and then Sunday night after he left I couldn't sleep, I was hot and couldn't cool off, and I just tossed and turned all night, and every now and then I would randomly break into tears. WTF. I was honestly just feeling depressed because of my joblessness, the long-distance thing with A, strained friendships, and missing my family and home.

I realized I was starting to question all my fundamental beliefs: what had I done so wrong to be so lonely in this big city--to be unemployed--to be longing for something, anything permanent to hold onto? I thought, maybe the universe isn't balanced after all. I have always believed that the universe gives you exactly what you need and leads you down the right path, even if it's not obvious to you that this is happening; but in my sadness over all this ish, I started to doubt it.

The next day I got the e-mail offering me the job. OK, universe. I get it. I'm back. Sorry I was being such a little bitch.

In other news, I might go home for several days/nights next week. I'm really excited. I miss my parents and I miss the South and I miss my cat tha Queen B and I miss cheese dip.

Until next time.

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