Pastadentally yours

Sorry I've been so sucky at posting lately. This week has actually been crazy busy. Monday and Tuesday were each an odd combination of slow and ridiculously busy. We had our longest editorial meeting since I've been there yesterday--over an hour. Ah! Then I rushed out the door to take an advanced beginner jazz class at Broadway Dance Center. Yes, it was a lot a lot of fun. But those classes are really expensive, so I'm going to have to limit how many I take. Maybe one every few weeks or so.

Anyway, then I got up pretty early this morning to meet with a health insurance rep to discuss my options. I'm currently uninsured and have been since I moved up here. My parents are both pretty passionate about making sure I have some sort of coverage until I get a job with benefits, so they've been wanting me to look at my options. So I talked with this guy for almost two hours and learned a lot about health insurance; it was actually really informative, despite the fact that he was trying to sell me something. Now I know more about HMOs and POSes than I ever wanted to know. No, not that kind of POS. Lolz.

Then I got home and took a nap, and while I was asleep for about an hour I got three work e-mails, including one that said I have three stories due in the next two weeks. Umm what! Ah! So then I spent the afternoon setting up interviews and stuff. Sigh. I love journalism. I really, really do. I love reporting and finding out information and writing. I just love it. When I have moments like that, where I remember why I'm up here trying to pursue this career, it makes all the hard stuff worth it.

Now to the main point of this post. I made pasta for dinner tonight, and it was UHMAZING. I was sauteeing veggies in a pink sauce and I accidentally dumped a lot of black pepper in. At first I was like, well shit I ruined my sauce, but then I just stirred it around and hoped for the best. This was the result.

Iz delicious. Eat me. twss

Recipe for deliciousness:
Whole wheat pasta
Red sauce
Alfredo sauce
Lots of black pepper
Some crushed red pepper (I did five shakes)
Sauteed veggies (I used red bell pepper, yellow bell pepper, and onion)

It basically ended up being a Cajun pasta. I think it would also be amazing with some kind of sausage or ground meat in it. It's quite spicy, so if you don't like that kinda stuff, then pass. But OMG so. good. nomnomnomnom

Sigh. Full belly.
Until next time.

Exploring El Barrio

In a monumental effort to avoid making a trip to Ikea to return my defunct bedside lamp, I decided to spend my Saturday afternoon exploring East Harlem. I went down to E 115th and found a new grocery store that's cleaner, more spacious, and cheaper than the one I go to now. I am very excited about this. Also discovered a Duane Reade on 3rd Ave near 115th that is, again, cleaner and more spacious than the Rite Aid I was used to frequenting. All and all, a very successful afternoon for finding new places to run errands.

After a trip to said drug store to get cold meds--I woke up today feeling worse than I have been, which is impressive since I've been feeling pretty bad for about a week and a half now ugh--I was going to just go home, but I really felt like I needed some exercise despite my respiratory issues. So I decided to walk around East Harlem and see what I could see. I walked up 3rd Ave to 125th, which is basically the heart of El Barrio. It's getting more and more gentrified--there's an H&M and Old Navy now--but there's still some cool culture and stuff. The street is lined with vendors selling random shit: "authentic" shea butter from Africa, all kinds of Obama memorabilia, and MLK Jr. stuff. Apparently even though East Harlem is officially Spanish Harlem now, black people still have quite a presence. Which, of course, I couldn't be happier about.

Also, I walked in a couple random stores, including a furniture store that was having a huge closeout sale. There I saw this:

Sign reads: "KIDS' RECLINER $100"

It might just look like a normal recliner in this photo, but don't be fooled. It's kid-sized. It's the smallest, cutest recliner ever made.

In other news, what is my deal with chairs? Strange fetish? Mayhaps. Also, I'm twittering now. Follow me!

Until next time.

If you can't beat 'em

I've had a change of heart over the past couple of weeks. At the beginning of last week, I was desperate, depressed, and pretty much ready to hang my hat on this whole "moving to New York and getting a job" thing. I really thought there must be something wrong with me, or with the way I'm doing things up here, that's preventing me from getting a job. Then I had din with Z last week and he said something that kind of changed my brain around. He said, "We're in a recession. This time doesn't count. You have to put your dreams on pause."

I hadn't thought about it that way at all, but it's pretty much true. I can't really land my dream job if no one is hiring. It's gotten to the point now where literally every single entry-level journalism position I see on Mediabistro or Ed2010 is freelance, part-time only, or, yes, UNPAID. So I decided that the only thing I can do to battle the monster of a shitty economy is to no longer try to battle it. I'm just going to ride it out. My parents said they would support me for six months. I've been up here nearly two months now, and I've had seven interviews, none of which were for a full-time, salaried position (except for the phone interview I did in December before I got up here), and one of which resulted in an internship. I think I'm not doing too bad.

I say all this because I interviewed at a blogging site today to be an unpaid intern there. I would basically get to blog as much as I wanted about whatever I wanted, and I would get to come into the office for meetings, workshops, etc., I think it would be a great way to get experience, especially since I'm starting to think this whole blog/Web thing is where I want to focus my career, and if no one is going to hire me full-time for another few months (perish the thought), I may as well do something in the meantime.

In other news, I have a cold, and a while ago I took a nap and woke up with half of my nose completely stopped up. BOO.

Until next time.

Strange fruit fell, struck me to the core

On my way home tonight, a Jewel song randomly came up on my iPod. I was obsessed with the album Spirit when I was in middle school. I have never blogged about music and I don't plan on starting (mostly because my everyday music choices lack depth and importance), but I listened to this song tonight and it spoke to me and I remembered being in sixth grade and how I used to sit in front of my boombox listening to Jewel and imagining what it would be like to fall in love.

Enter From The East - Jewel

EDIT: Apparently iMeem or whatevz won't let me play the whole song. I don't know why or I sux at technology... apologiez.

Fashion weekend

Of all my weekends so far in New York, aside from the one that C was in town, this one was by far the best. Z and I hung out a lot and lolzed a lot. Dear God I'm already boring myself. I'll just stick to highlights.

Yesterday was VDay, my least/favorite holiday ever. I have to admit that a really cheesy part of me likes it, even though I didn't have an SO to share it with, because I think it's great to have a holiday that celebrates a human emotion few of us truly get to share with another person. But mostly I just think it's capitalist bullshit created to sell cards and pink balloons and chocolates to people completely devoid of creativity. If anyone ever gets me a box of chocolates shaped like a heart for VD, it's over. I can buy that shit my damn self the day after VD for 50% off.

Ernywayz, I had an excellent VD. Lolz. I spent the first part of the day shopping; my mom sent me some discount cards for a couple stores, so I got some new skinny jeans and underwear and stuff. I also bought myself lunch at a random diner on the UES, just because I wanted to. I was starving and I really wanted a Diet Coke and a sandwich and some fries. So I got all those things and sat and ate by myself in a restaurant--on Valentine's Day. It was just coincidence that I ate by myself in public in the city for the first time on VD, and I really didn't mind at all. In fact I thoroughly enjoyed myself. I just ate and people-watched and texted people and it was amazing. I felt like a real New Yorker.

That night Z and I went to Fashion Week because a friend of his who works in PR had an extra invite to the Monarchy Collection show. We went, we saw, we shmehed. I mean, don't get me wrong, it was a totally cool experience and I'm really glad we went because we got all dressed up and it was just neat to be there. But overall, the show only lasted 20 minutes, and we were surrounded by all the people I hate: paparazzi, people with more cents than sense, and general society bitches. It was cool, and I would love to go to the show of a designer I'm actually somewhat familiar with, but overall I was left thinking: all this pomp and circumstance for fucking clothes? I love clothes, and I love being creative and dressing up and stuff, but I also see homeless people every day on my way to the subway. It's all about perspective I guess.

So after that we had an uhmazing dinner at a thai place in Hell's Kitchen, then went for drinks at a bar a couple blocks away. Then today we prepped Z's living room for painting tomorrow, ate Chinese, and went to a housewarming party for the guy who sold me the chair, who also happens to work part-time blogging for The New Yorker. It was aight; I met some fellow journalists, and realized I am but one of a million tiny unemployed fish in a huge festering sea of joblessness. It made me feel better, actually. Sucks because we're all after the same jobs, but nice to know I'm not alone.

Until next time.

Before it's too late

Happy 2,000th visitor, dear beloved blog of mine.

And maaaany more.

Until next time.

To your chair from my chair

It's here, y'all. I'm lounging in my new huge chair, and it's super comfortable, and the entire move, from E 10th to E 118th, took exactly an hour. Also I didn't have to do anything. I paid the mover, who I found randomly on Craigslist, $45. And the guy I bought the chair from was super helpful and helped the guy move it into my apt, so I gave him some extra cash too. All together, chair + move = $122. Not bad.

As promised, a photo.

Iz big

Right now the chair seems a little big for the space, but I'm sure I will get used to it. Next project: a television/DVD player and a dresser.

I'm still waiting to hear back from the interviews I had last week. I'm still hopeful. Hope with me!

Until next time.

The chair as a symbol, part 2

Ladies and gentlemen, I have a chair.

Well, I mean, I made a down payment of $17 on a $60 chair. I talked him down from $100! Here is the chair, in all its unimpressive glory, turned on its side and wrapped in plastic.

Plz to take me home and unwrap me? Twhs

Last night was a really hard night for me. I went to bed after midnight, then woke up again at around 1:30, then again around 3:30, then 4:30, and I didn't go back to sleep again. I just decided to get up around 7:20, instead of my normal rising time of about 8:10. I was having a bunch of stress dreams about the job hunt and continually being rejected. I went to work exhausted, then there was no cream for the office coffee. Sad day.

Then toward the end of the day, after I wrote a story and went to an edit meeting, both with about the same lackadaisical (OMGz that word is so hard to spell) attitude, I decided to change my mind and be positive. In the edit meeting one of my bosses was like, 'So, Meghan, do you have anything? Anything to add?' I was embarrassed to say no, except some viral videos I had found and was going to send to her as ideas for the site.

Since I started the internship, I've had the wrong attitude. Oh, it's only part-time. Oh, it doesn't pay, so why should I make an effort? The answer is I should make an effort because: what else have I got to do? Yes, I'm unemployed. But half-assing my internship certainly isn't going to change that. So this afternoon I had a change of mind and decided to give it my all, despite the lack of pay. I typed up the notes I had taken at the edit meeting and sent them to the editors, without having to be asked. It's a small thing but it seemed like they appreciated it.

So the picture above is just the chairy on top of my ice cream sunday. OMGGGG I'm too good. Or bad. You decide.

I still have to schedule movers some time this week, and get the thing from E 10th to E 118th st, but I have high hopes. I will certainly upload after pics, and I fully expect them to be more impressive than the before pic above.

Until next time.

38 days

That's how long I've officially been unemployed in New York. I moved up Dec. 30, and it's now Feb. 6. 1 + 31 + 6 = 38. Sure, I have an internship, but it's unpaid, so as far as the country's unemployment rate is concerned, I continue to give freely of myself. You're welcome.

I wonder if I'm doing something wrong, or if I should be doing something differently. I feel like I've applied to pretty much every media-related job I've seen on Mediabistro, Ed2010, and Craigslist--even those that were more administrative and not editorial. I've been on several interviews, and gotten lots of "no"s. Maybe I should be pitching more for freelance work. I don't know. I'm starting to feel the desperation of wanting to have something to celebrate about and continuing to have nothing.

I had a couple interviews Wednesday. One at a national weekly magazine to be an editorial intern for their Web site (it pays, $10/hr!). I think it went really well; everyone was really nice and even people I didn't interview with were nice to me and smiled in the halls. It sounds stupid but getting a good vibe from a place is something I value, because in New York it seems difficult to find a place to work where people actually seem to be happy to work there. I interviewed with three of the staffers there, one of whom told me they hadn't had any other applicants with as much CMS experience as I have. That's good. I just really, really want it. It seemed like a good atmosphere, I would get a ton of production experience, and would also get to do editorial stuff. Positive thoughts!

The other interview was my second one at the gym. It was kind of bizarre and I don't really feel like talking about it in detail, except to say that halfway through the interview, he tried to sell me on a higher-ranking, full-time position. I was like, well, I'm trying to pursue a career in magazines, and I need something to do in the meantime and part-time after I get a day job. It was highly awkward. I was supposed to hear back from them today, but nothing yet. I'll call Monday if I don't hear back this weekend.

I know I need to think positively, and I appreciate any positive thought y'all are willing to give me, but it's a lot harder for me to think positively than it is for everyone else to. This is my life, I'm living it, and only I really know how this feels. I just want so badly to have something to celebrate, to have a reason to get out of bed every morning, to feel fulfilled by what I'm doing here. To feel like moving to New York was for a reason--and not just because it's something I've wanted forever.

For now though, I have to run. I'm filling my brain with projects, and my current project is finding a chair for the corner of my room. So I have a couple to go look at tonight. I'll keep you updated.

Until next time.

My life was a movie

For a moment, at least. Normally y'all know how I feel about relationship blogging: I do it, but I keep it to a minimum, because no one gives a shit about my personal wees and woes, LBO. But I have talked about it before, just because it certainly is a part of my life, and sometimes I feel really affected (effected?), and that leaving it out would be leaving out a part of myself . This is def one of those times.

As I told you, A and I decided to take some time apart (OK, we broke up) after I went to DC for the inauguration. A lot of shit went down (again, nonnayobiz) and it was dramatic and exhausting and I was pretty much over it. We didn't talk for a week or so, then I started to feel really angry toward him for the hurt he had caused, and I decided I wanted to tell him about it, for the sake of getting it off my chest and making sure he understood just what he had done wrong and just how badly I was hurt. So we talked on the phone Sunday night, and I told him everything. One of the things I told him was that when I left DC, his behavior showed me he didn't care enough to fight for me: he pretty much put me in a cab and sent me off, and he barely spoke to me that morning, and he wouldn't touch me. He knew he was losing me, and instead of fighting, he just sent me away. That's when something clicked in my head and I was ready to say goodbye to him.

Anywayz I told him all of this and more of the reasons he hurt me, and he said, "If I knew it meant you would give me another chance, I would pack some stuff into a bag and start walking to New York right now." I was like OMGZ, first of all, that's the most dramatic thing I've ever heard, and, second of all, it's bullshit because it's really easy to say something like that when you know I would never ask you to do it. Ever the skeptic, I denied in my brain that he would ever do something like that. So we left that phone conversation right where we had started.

The next day at work I started thinking about things and getting pissed off again, because how dare he say something like that to me when he had no intention of carrying it out? So I IMed him (never a good idea, PS), and confronted him about it. His response was to e-mail me a confirmation for a bus ticket that he had bought earlier that morning to come to NYC Tuesday night. He had bought a ticket without telling me, and was going to show up at my house without telling me; part of me resented the intrusion, but more of me was overwhelmed by the sweetness of the gesture.

I came home from work/happy hour Tuesday night and he was waiting for me on my steps. Of course he was sort of awkward and acting unsure of himself, because he's just sort of that way all the time, and some of my friends still disapprove of my letting him come see me, but I've always wished in my heart that someone would care enough about me to do something like that, and now he's done it.

The human heart is amazing and ridiculous and stupid.

Until next time.