Friday, March 12, 2010

The reason Lady Gaga is an artist and I love her

So, yes, the Telephone video came out last night. It's good. It's really good. I have some problems with it. Namely, that the story in the video has nothing to do with the lyrics of the song - which, LBO, I'm totally willing to overlook based solely on the fact that within the first 60 seconds we see Lady Gaga's shaved vadge - and the over-the-top product placements for Virgin Mobile,, Diet Coke, Polaroid, etc etc etc, which kind of bothered me, but not enough to make me dislike the video.

However, there is one scene that basically encompasses everything I love about Lady Gaga. Starting at 2:15, we see Lady Gaga, coke can rollers in hair, standing in a common area with a bunch of other prisoners when a lady brawl breaks out. (PS, I basically loved the video from the moment the text "Prison for Bitches" appeared across the screen. Yes. Yes. Yes.) And guesssssss who makes a cameo during said scene.

None other than Stefani Germanotta - Lady Gaga before she was Lady Gaga. I actually mentioned to Zac recently that I wished she would go brown and make a cameo as her old self, or even do an entire performance as her old self, so thanks, universe. When I first watched the video, I wasn't sure it was her, but on a third and fourth run-through, and lots of pausing, I'm 99% sure this is Lady Gaga "dressed up" as her old self, which is sort of a brilliant idea, considering that "Lady Gaga" herself is the result of costume, makeup and the creation of a character, i.e. dressing up.

Hellllllloooo, Stefani.

EDIT: As it turns out, it's Gaga's younger sister Natali making a cameo in the video, not Gaga as her former self. Meh. This makes the video less cool for me; however, I will concede that they look a lot alike and the effect is sort of the same. It still ends up looking like Stefani, and I do wonder if that's what Gaga intended.

Aside from this moment, the video had several brilliant points. A rundown of my favorites:

After we see her blurred naked vadge, the two dyke prison guards walk away and exchange the following words: "I told you she didn't have a dick." "Too bad." BRILLIANT.

Wait, is that the pussy wagon? From Kill Bill?

"You've been a very bad girl. A very, very, bad, BAD girl, Gaga." 'Nuff said.

Bey then feeds Lady Gaga a bite of a honey bun, and Gaga says, mouth full, "Mmmm mmmm, Honey Bey." Yes. Yes. Yes.

All the gays using baguettes and lettuce heads as telephones.

I meeeeeeean. If there's a universe that exists in which this is not fucking hilarious, we should just blow it up.

 Bey wearing yellow and the sunglasses from Paparazzi. I love a throwback.

Yeeeeep. 'Twas in fact the pussy wagon. Dear Quentin, Thanks for being my BFF. Love, Lady Gaga

Considering that I've loved Beyoncé for years and my love for Lady Gaga is tattoo-worthy, this video was basically orgasmic for me. I don't think it was as good as the Bad Romance video, but I also think they're just completely different. Bad Romance is futuristic, inspired by Stanley Kubrick, and very avant-garde; Telephone is sort of a Western, inspired by Quentin Tarantino and Baz Luhrmann, and very tongue-in-cheek. Different strokes for different folks.

But I mean, prison for bitches. Pussy wagon. Gaga dressed as a pussy (cat) dancing around in front of the pussy wagon. Dykes everywhere. Oh, and this bitch and her huge fucking hairbow.
I'd say it was a success.


  1. O.M.F.G you did a review on GaGa's video?
    I love her to death, i mean i would go all out in the karaoke studio singing and dancing to Paparazi and i'm a straight guy. Fucking proud of it still. My friends were like WTF Zac?

    Good job, i'm gonna love you so much now:)
    oh BTW, i love Patti Smith a lot too. Her rendition of 'Smells Like Teen Spirit' hit several veins in my heart. You should check it out:)

  2. I'm not a GaGa fan. Like, at all. I really didn't like this song either. But, admittedly, that video was pretty freaking hilarious on so, so many levels.

  3. The lead singer from Semi-Precious Weapons is also in the background behind Bey's man/victim in the diner.

    It's very Thelma and Louise. I like it.

  4. Me again. I've read in your previous post (Patti post) that you wanna listen to all kinds of music and uhh you might wanna try out these songs i posted on my blog. Look for latest post.


  5. Lady Gaga definitely goes for what sells. It's good to see that she doesn't take herself seriously and that makes me want to watch her videos. 'Cause they are so over the top.

  6. The video was the very essence of terrible.

  7. It appears that might actually be Gaga's sister Natali Germanotta with the dark hair and shades.

  8. Every part of this video is just...flawless. That's pretty much it.

  9. Haha! I had to watch this video twice to understand it. Very intriguing and very Gaga. She is amazing.

  10. It is very Gaga, I like the inclusion of her sister, it's cute.

  11. I've been a Gaga fan for a long time, and she just keeps getting better and better.
    It says "To be continued..." at the end of the video, and I'm sure something awesome will come of that. :D

  12. How did you spot her sister? I watched the video several times, and never noticed it! Brilliant!